Life Lesson # 1

You are a nobody as long as you are expected to hear whatever it is that is being said to you. The day you start talking and people start listening... Step back and take a bow!!

Maamujaan!!

Yesterday, i was studying in our college reading room [this introduction just so that i come across as the studious kinds ;) ] when I got a call from my beloved mamu. He said he had made the call to give me his new mobile no. and then he added that another reason was that he was sitting idly when he saw his little one (my niece) walking around the house. I think she's around 8-9 years and mamu said looking at her he was reminded of me when i was her age. He said she was just like me and even sounded happy about it.. :D (biiiiiig smile) By the time i hung up i was welling up big time!!
There's something so very special about people who have seen you as toddlers and lil people (not infants please..i don't know about you but i sure don't remember much about my diaper wetting days!) especially when you've spent considerable time with them as kids and have a few memories of your own..

So mere pyaare mamujaan, this one's for you. I don't know if you ever noticed, though i'm pretty sure i made it loud and clear, that as a kid you were one of my very few favourite adults. :) i think the reason why we bonded so well was coz you were the youngest in your strings of siblings too (Cheers to Us!!)

I remember how after having fought with every single adult at nani's place i used to come to you with big swollen eyes or a big swollen red face!! he he ;)
And i remember how you used to take my side when everyone used to take my case, even though you were the "young" one too and everyone else was elder to you. The amount of pride i used to fill up with then cannot be put down in words.

You were like a second papa, just a little more younger and a little more complying. So to say that you didn't mind narrating the same "Sheikhchilli" stories over and over again as many times as i demanded. Nor did you mind me jumping all over you or even kicking you sometimes in anger(I AM SOOOO SORRY... what a horrible thing to do!) And oh yes! the hair pulling session! (sorry for that too..but i'm sure it worked like a head massage for you..no? after all, ow much strength could a seven year old pack into a single hair pulling stroke?? ;) )

There are so many memories and every time we talk now, after i've hung up, Believe me i spend atleast few minutes remembering all the good times!
Okay, i'm feeling senti again. Just wanted to say that because of you my summer vacations were made THE BEST!!
I wish you all the happiness mamu, may you have a zillion reasons to smile evry single day coz you totally deserve them all!! Have a very very Happy life!!
Love you lots
Aapki L.M.

For My Best Friends..

I think each one of us, at some point or the other, goes through this "phase" where nothing seems right, when you feel like running away to a faraway place and start over or something...
The adage "a friend in need, is a friend indeed" might sound highly cliche, but that is just the way it is... :)
I have noticed that whenever i'm sad, i have this strong urge to write something.. it could be an attempt at making up some random sentences in my head or a poem.. sometimes, it's like a whole jumble of lines that really make no sense at all!!
As i said..when you're in "the phase" NOTHING works out! Not even a silly poem! But see how wonderful friends can be, that their mere thought can work wonders.. So here's a little something i managed to get out of that jumble...

If I was to die right now
would you come to my funeral?
and when the priest asks for a eulogy
would you step up and speak for me?

Would you tell the cruel world,
how i fought it brave?
and how i got the pride and honour,
which i now take to my grave?

Show them my dear
how i lie in my coffin, dead but not defeated
and tell the world that its attempts to crush my spirit,
i always with a smile greeted.

Tell them i won the battle,
tell them i survived,
tell them i lived my life,
and now i peacefully die.

And know this my dear friend,
in this world sore,
had you not been with me
i would have gone long before.


For Push and Suppi... i love you guys..

In My Car, I'll Be The Driver

Clutch...Gear...Accelerator (or Race..atleast that's what my driving tutor kept calling it) I only got two feet you know... ;)

But i loved it! It's sort of empowering. Seriously. :) And thanks to the tutor, i felt empowered alright! He just handed over the keys to me and asked me to start..i told him that it was my first class and i knew just as much about driving a car as he did about amalgam fillings! Surprisingly, that didn't seem to bother him much. So there i was..the keys in my hand and the road ahead of me. I drove for one hour straight! At the end of which, i was just plain HAPPY. It's no big feat i know, but it felt Grrrreat!! I may not be the lean, mean, riding machine.....yet....but i'm having a gooooood time.. :)

I AM BACK!!

If blogging sites had some kind of a one-year-non-usage-expiry thingy....then PHEW!! made it!!!!! yehoo!! Period.

I was watching TV yesterday and i happened to come across this news channel doing a special V-Day bit..I thought, okay so they are gonna go around asking love birds about the significance of the day for them n blah blah blah...u know the drill...and not that I get the whole point of a "news" channel doing valentine's day specials, but okay..it's an event..u can cover it...but good lord!! The "special" turned out be this Oh-SOOOOO-STAGE MANAGED bit about how rakhi sawant and her boyfriend fought on the V-day and then got back together...gimme a break!! The guy was on his knees begging her to forgive him and NO it was not in the sweet, romantic, out-of-a-fairytale kinda way..it was fake n outright "filmy"...yuck!
How can news channels even think of dishing out such crap? i don't get it! And even when they do have stories that are worth being told, it's just made into a rat race with who gets it first...and the people involved are just lost somewhere........Sad.

shud update my blog........
really shud update my blog.....
kinda want to update my blog....
will definitely update my blog...
mmmmmmmmmm..............................................
k...i'm outta here...
ciao!

Down The Rabbit-Hole

Yup! I can see it! It's a long, dark, deep, endless hole and I'm only raring to take the plunge! For all those who are thinking this is Alice-the gardener speaking..Well you couldn't be more wrong. I'm talking about peeking inside a hole that has the signpost of "COLLEGE" dug right beside it. What awaits me..I don't know. What is expected of me..I don't know again. All I know is that I've waited long enough for this and I truly deserve it.

OK, confession time..Dental (yeah, BDS) wasn't my first preference. But after watching the "good" Medical seats waving their Bye Byes at me("good", coz I didn't want the second rate colleges that were being offered) as I sat in the counseling hall AND after the one doctor I respect the most, brainwashed me with a one hour lecture on how good dental is for "girls", I went for it! Do I regret it, you ask? NOT in the least. I don't regret decisions that have been made, I don't feel sorry for them later. And much though the idea of "destiny" does not appeal to me, I surely do think whatever happens, happens for the best. Period.

So..where was I? Yeah, the Rabbit Hole! Well I spent nearly a week in a new hostel, surrounded by new people, new walls, new furniture, new food...a new Wonderland! And a wonderland it for sure is! How? Well, simply because Alice is unsure, she's uncertain, she's a little perplexed, a little frustrated, a little annoyed and maybe even a little homesick...ok, ok..remove the maybe, but the little stays.. ;)

Alice - The Fresher, is asked to wish her seniors. Seniors she doesn't even know, seniors she'd like to know someday though..and how does one spot a senior?? It is DAMN easy. Whenever you come across a female walking down the corridor, staring right ahead, with a gait that's neither too swift, nor too slow....THERE!! Good Morning MA'AM!! easy no? I think so too..

As for the college..well our classes didn't really start off. The only eventful day being the one, where we were lead to the dissection hall and they brought out the "Dead Guyz". One after the other, the no. of gurneys increasing by the second. Ok wait, did i sound insensitive when i said "dead guyz"? Lemme clear this up then..insensitive, i'm not and according to a lot of people, practicality is wayyy out of my reach too. But somehow, on seeing what i saw that day, after an initial gasp of "Oh! Goodness!", i knew sensitivity had to walk out..to make space for an ounce of practicality and a whole lot of focus! And the latter two had to be covered with a blanket of insensitivity...without which, both of 'em would have no meaning. I was amazed then, by how fast my mind was telling me things. "Don't feel sorry for them coz like it or not, they ARE dead. Nothing you do, can change THAT! Infact, if at all you want to feel sorry..look around..you'll find plenty of reasons! You're in the vicinity of a HOSPITAL for crying out loud! and then think, if your knowledge(gained in this dissection hall) is going to, someday, help reduce the suffering of the ones living..isn't it ALL worth it??"

Believe it or not, this lil lecture helped me to get past that class. However, later in the day (somehow 'later' is always a good time to think objectively) I couldn't help thinking how unfortunate those people were. I mean, usually these are the unclaimed bodies, UNCLAIMED. No one to take them to a place called home, where "their" people mourn their death. Remember times spent with them and feel true pain. Shed a tear, not beacuse it's a mourning ceremony, but coz it all seems wrong!! Terribly wrong! And as if all this wasn't enough they end up in some medical college, as a lab specimen!! But then again, the lil voice in my head speaks up and the message is conveyed. "If, after they're dead, they still are in a position to help prevent another one(even if indirectly so) and if they could somehow be made aware of this fact...wouldn't they find comfort in it?? Wherever they are?? If at all, they are??" Alice is not so sure...

FOREWORD

The Title Explained :
Okay, so today i start my own blog!! Yaaay!! Alrite coming to the title..well there are lots of reasons for it u see..n here they are :-

1. Alice in a Wonderland was the very first proper book that i ever read..besides the ladybird classics i.e. :)

2. It was my first on-stage character!! gosh!! i remember how i was all dressed up in pink from head to toe n even made to wear a pink lipstick(eeeeks!!!) But now when i look back at it..................................mmmm..no..it STILL IS a lil eeky..but yeah..kinda tolerable now.. ;)

3. Last but definitely not the least..n i guess this has something to do with me playin alice in the school play..i always kinda felt like i was a lil alice myself..in fact i think everyone is..and the world is r wonderland!! he he he!! okay..i think i should shut up now...my fundas can be really wacky sometimes..

so that's pretty much about the title..n as of now i can't think of anything else that can be included in this post..so i guess that will be all for today..